I’m Not Okay

I know a lot of you have noticed my writing language has changed within the last few days and may leave you scratching your heads wondering, what has gotten into that woman. 🤔

Well, a simple answer to that would be,

LIFE!…

Life has me spinning 😵‍💫 in circles, which is causing my mental and emotional health to be in a downward slope.

But I’m here to tell you, I’m not going to apologize for my erratic behavior. Everyone has their good days and bad days. The last few days just happen to be my bad days. Well, if you don’t count my car breaking down last week.

I don’t always have to be strong all the time. This is me, being my authentic self. Not that I haven’t always been, but it seems as though people in my life expect me to be able to keep it all together, all the time. No. It doesn’t work that way. I am human and I have feelings just like everyone else. I am allowed to vent, to be sad, and to be angry.

Quote from https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/john_trudell_740335?src=t_being_human

That’s what makes me human. I’m not some programmed robot who doesn’t have feelings. I’m very much, one hundred percent human, who has real feelings and emotions. Life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, storms move in when we least expect them. But, with time, I will bounce back, and I will eventually be okay.

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I’m not okay, 
The weight on my chest,
Crushing me down,
I can’t catch my breath.

I’m not okay,
nothing to numb the pain,
my heart aches,
with unending pain.

I’m not okay,
But I’ll keep fighting,
I won’t give up,
I’ll keep writing.

I’m not okay,
But that’s okay,
I’ll find my way,
To a brighter day.